When Nature Calls

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Typically, the phrase ‘when nature calls’ indicates someone has an immense need to use the toilet to perform any of the usual restroom rituals we all humans do. However, in this case, the meaning I would like to convey is more realistic and less euphemistic; I’m talking about hiking in the mountains.

See, given that I am broke and can’t afford a hedonistic lifestyle that will involve alcohol, drugs, and lots of sex, like that of any stereotypical writer, I need to find a way to stay healthy while creating fiction and working to pay the bills.

Trying to free my mind and remain as healthy as possible, I stay away from the fry food and nachos at the restaurant and take walks in the mountains. The experience is immeasurable. Today, I burned so many calories I saw smoke coming out of my ass.

Of course, that last line was a joke.

I’ll try to go to the mountains as much as I can. Honestly, it is a beautiful experience.

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